First weeks of school

Ok so earlier, in my blog, I talked about how I am a procrastinator. That has not changed, it has just been targeted towards my blog since nursing school procrastination is not an option. I have a few minutes before my spanish class so I thought I would catch up on how nursing school has been going.
First for epiphanies:
1. I realize that this is absolutely what I am supposed to be doing, no doubt.
- I can't believe I get excited about learning to change a bedpan, or realizing you can change a bed with someone in it!
2. I realize that what makes me feel alive or feel like a social contributor is finding a way to be useful and help others. Not in an altruistic way, but with a slight egoist philosophy that helping others and being needed makes me feel good about myself. But that's okay right? Because ultimately people benefit from our deeds even if we want them to.

So I am starting my third week, Wow it went fast. And I just had my first exam. So Scary! I have taken many exams throughout school, but this one is unlike anything I have ever taken. It is not about defining terms or memorizing concepts, it is all application. How I did is yet to be discovered. I am just hoping for a B.
Not only did I have an exam but I also had to "check off" on four skills. Making an occupied bed, brushing a partner's teeth (awkward), assisting said partner with a bedpan and a urinal. We get intimate with each other real quick. My personal space issues have gone out the door!
One of the things I love about nursing school is that I have 84 students in all of my lectures and those same 84 students will (hopefully) all be graduating with me. So though we walk hesitantly towards friendships with one another, there is a security in knowing that we will be able to depend on each other and walk through the same journey for the next two years, not just one semester.
Another thing that I didn't realize is that nursing school is difficult, not necessarily for the content of the nursing, (I am sure that will come later) but rather the volume of work required every day! I literally read an average of 10 chapters a week on top of watching videos for skills and taking quizzes in almost every class. There is literally not enough time to fit everything in, but you know I try.
I love my support system for coming over for free food and letting me practice my skills on them. They just don't realize that the skills may get progressively more invasive. I'm sure that soon they will see me and run the other way. But I'll take advantage while I can.
I am super busy and a bit stressed but over all, I am loving this new experience. I don't know how much I will update but I'll definitely post the highlights.

Orientation

OK, so I thought I would take a break from reading my textbooks to write a little about how my orientation went. And for those thinking, I am only reading ahead because I am nerdy, its not true. I have 9, count them,9 full chapters to read plus handouts before next Thursday. And while most people would be glad that they have the whole weekend to study, weekends for me mean work. My kids are home, my husband is traveling, so there isn't going to be much reading going on unless there is a Spongebob marathon on. Anyway, first let me try to describe how I feel about nursing school after leaving orientation today. It's similar to standing on the top of a skyscraper and feeling alive, and powerful, and strong, until you look down... and then you are terrified.



My feeling can best be summed up by a file folder I just bought. On one side it says
"I'm living the dream"
on the other side it says
"I'm crying on the inside"
Now before you go and call me defeatist, let me just say that I have never seen this volume of work ever! It's never ending, never lets up, only gets more intense. With that said, I absolutely think I can do this!
Ok, on to orientation. I got there about 20 min early and sat down in a reasonable middle seat. Scoped the room and noticed name cards with pictures on it. People started moving when they recognized their face and so I did the same thing. ANd guess where I was placed. Smack dab in the front and in the center. Thanks husband for giving me a last name that is in the front of the alphabet. We sat in alphabetical order. As soon as class started we were handed a math test covering the first 6 chapters.I felt like I was drunk on summer and that test sobered me up and took away my buzz. This is it. Summer is over.
What else? Oh! I ordered my uniforms,all white. Ugly but at least I was able to choose male pants because they are so much less granny than the womens. Ugh, front pleats.
Also got a nurse pack with all kinds of goodies:
Tracheostomy care kit
catheter
iv solution and syringe
bandage scissors
enema
gloves
suction kit
etc...
All in all it was a good day, Still don't know how to make the sign of the cross at the appropriate time, but I did make some connections and feel like I'm going to school with a great group of people. So if I can pick my head up out of my books, I'll post again once my classes get going.

Pre-nursing school lull.

I'm so bored! I have way too much time on my hands and too much time to wonder why I am so ambitious to have decided to pursue another career in my 30s.Other things I have too much time to worry about:

1. Did I lose brain cells over the summer?

2. Am I going to gain the freshman 15 even though I have been doing prereqs for two years and I can't afford to gain even 5 pounds?

3. Am I going to know what to do or say in those inevitably awkward moments where you are dealing with a patient's bodily fluids or anything else unmentionable?

4. Are my friends going to forget that I am here if they don't see me the next two years?

5. Is my style going to slip even more into "What Not to Wear" eligibility?

6. Are my kids main food groups going to be hot dogs, corn dogs, chicken nuggets, and french fries?

7 Am I going end up like this?

Everything is in! I met the deadline through much procrastination but I managed to get all my tests and documents in to the nursing office! I have been poked and prodded, proving that I can't get or give tuberculosis, measles, mumps, rubella, or chicken pox.I have been certified as a professional rescuer, and I have the crappiest health insurance ( high deductible, no copay) just so that I have proof of insurance. But I am officially ready for school.
So now, I am going to enjoy the rest of summer, read some good books, and take as many naps as I can. Because my life is going to get crazy in three weeks.
For example, look at all the books I had to buy for first semester!



So, you probably won't hear much from me til school starts because I am going to be lazy and do nothing!

Rule number 1: Don't be weird

I was talking to my friend this morning about her hospital experience after giving birth and she left me a voicemail describing her student nurse. The first thing I thought was,"oh no, what did she do?!" Immediately my mind goes to making excuses for her. "Well, maybe her instructor made her, maybe it was on her must do list, maybe you mistook her intentions...." Why? Because this nurse undoubtedly could have been me!
My number one fear, other than the fear of getting shot or going to jail when it's not my fault, is not getting a hint and being that super annoying person. I know you are thinking,"there are much more important things to be worried about" but I don't worry so much about the workload of school or the exams or passing, I worry about clinicals and the responsibility of taking care of someone in the hospital who doesn't need to worry that their student nurse is going to be annoying, awkward, or just plain weird! I may not be weird but I most certainly find myself in some awkward situations or conversations where I just want to make a beeline for the door.
So, I welcome the stories of the students who won't leave your room, or who offer unsolicited advice, or sound like walking computers because it is a heads up for me to not be those things.
Remember the number one rule: DON'T BE WEIRD!

Why Nursing?

So a lot of people probably wonder why I would go from a music career to nursing. Let me start by quoting one of my favorite lines from the show "Scrubs". Sarah Chalke's character turns to a nurse (they were dealing with doctor-nurse relationships) and she berated her by saying,"At least I didn't go to nursing school after a failed singing career." When I heard that I about spit out my water laughing because I'm sure that while we had a very successful career many people wonder if this is my fallback career.Yes, in the sense that I started school during the last years of our career with the intention of going to nursing school, but it was actually not the first attempt at school. I am what you would consider a bonafide nerd. Not the cool, intellectual type that will debate for hours about art and politics or even medical issues in the media, but rather I used to be on our tour bus studying algebra for fun or trying to teach myself spanish for the umpteenth time. More recently I wait till my kids go to bed to play the piano for an hour. Totally useless intelligence. (Who uses Algebra in everyday life?)
I'm saying this because I have wanted to be in the medical profession for as long as I can remember. My life plan was to go to Emory University after high school and become a doctor. God had other plans. I have loved, loved , loved singing and all the experiences I have had over the years, but I have always secretly wanted to get an education in the medical field. I even applied to a university right before one of our cds came out but quickly realized that at the time, school would never work. I could imagine myself saying,"I can't make finals because I'll be in Amsterdam for the thousandth time."

So, anyway,(this is really long). I finally realized that I wasn't born into the wrong family and that maybe this nursing thing is actually in my blood. My cousin recently shared with me that my great aunt Carolease was actually one of the first black nurses in Richmond.


She worked as a nurse in public health and her career spanned 45 years. She received her master's in nursing and was a nurse educator the last years of her career. She will be my inspiration when nursing school gets really tough and I want to say,"Never mind."And so will my grandmother who recently passed away, who pushed me to finish my schooling even though we were to busy to go to school due to the demands of traveling. I was so pleased to tell her before she died that I had been accepted to nursing school. I just wish she could have seen me graduate.I am going to go to school and finish because I know that it is in me. I am doing this in honor of them and to make my family proud.

Is this a precursor?

So Yesterday I called the nursing school that I am going to be attending to find out when the nursing program orientation is going to be. Now, I really wanted to know, 1. Because it feels wierd to be doing nothing during the summer and actually having time off, and 2. because I wanted to make sure I didn't miss it or won't be on vacation during the alloted orientation time. So, I call and ask the receptionist or whoever answers a nursing office phone. And this is what she said,
Me: " HI, I'm just calling to find out when the nursing orientation will be held."
Lady: "Do we have your email address?"
Me:"I believe so."
Lady: " Okay, well we'll send you an email letting you know."

WHAT?!?! Why all the secrecy? Really? I can't just can't get a roundabout date? Wierd. SO now I'm worried that this is how nursing school is going to be. I know that I basically sign my life over to them for the next two years but can I at least get a heads up about when I am going to be doing that?



Ok, so on another note, I watched the show,"HawthoRNe" last night on TNT. And I thought it was good, but will hopefully be great as the season goes along. My friend referred to me as "Jada" and I was flattered and would love to be that character, but I have to say that I will probably be more like the new nurse that cried everyday. At least till I really get comfortable in my job. But right now, I'm just concerned with passing my 8 hour CPR class and not re-killing my dummy a la Dwight Shrute.